Every few weeks or so I come across an article, blog post, meme, or bit of fashion advice about how to avoid Mom Jeans (gasp!) and be stylish even though you may be a mom. Honestly, this advice simultaneously cracks me up and makes me roll my eyes and wonder what kind of writer’s block inspired the post. In the first place, I haven’t seen a pair of Mom Jeans since I was a kid–in the ’80s–when my own mom, and every other person, regardless of age and gender, wore them. In the second place, the antidote is the same. Every time.
Truthfully, I think there’s a new Mom Jean in town. But instead of high rise, tapered leg, acid wash, it’s low rise, skinny, dark wash. Or yoga pants. Pair with boots or ballet flats and a tunic or long sweater. You know that look when you see it!
Oh, and Mom Hair? The bob has been replaced with a top knot. Amirite? In our desperation to get away from what our mothers wore, we’ve created New Mom Jeans for our generation. Nothing wrong with that, of course, but the irony isn’t lost on me.
Does this crazy hatred of our moms’ clothes strike anyone else as hilarious? I kind of think this actually has very little to do with motherhood and everything to do with the fashion of the day, which leads me to wonder if our daughters will roll their eyes and wonder how we could EVER bring ourselves to wear something as unfashionable as skinny jeans (gasp!), an infinity scarf, and a top knot.
I made my first blog post four days ago. And told no one.
This was on purpose to some extent…I was planning to publish several more posts and have even more “waiting in the wings” to get my blog off to a good start. But for four days I’ve been a little paralyzed on the writing front (not that I’ve had a ton of time to sit down and write anyway) because of the confusion of inner conversation going on in my head every time I’ve started to think about what to say. So, yesterday I started thinking about all this (in the shower, if you must know), and realized that once again, I find myself face-to-face with my age-old nemesis: Comparison, aka “Do-You-Think-You-Can-Measure-Up?”
Ick. Really??! I mean, goodness gracious, besides the fact that I’ve been excited about starting this blogging venture for months, one of my main goals in writing here is to encourage others “You can do it! Don’t worry about being perfect; just do the best you can!” I tell friends all the time, “You have what it takes! Just be creative! Perfection doesn’t matter; everyone is so different, and has a different beauty to bring to the world.” And yet, the internal dialogue is stewing, “Are you sure you can do this? What if you don’t meet peoples’ expectations? What if you don’t meet your own expectations? You really don’t have a corner on any one market here…you’re not as crunchy as ________, or as crafty as _________, or as organized as ________. What if you don’t follow all the right rules or blog etiquette and other bloggers think you’re rude or don’t like you? Do you really think you can write often enough about interesting enough things to keep people happy? Who do you think you are??” And ugly Comparison strikes at my heart once again.
But if I’ve learned anything in my time on this earth, it’s this: When Comparison comes knocking, kick it to the curb! I find it rather ironic that one of the main things I desire to empower others to get rid of in their lives becomes the first battle I have to fight for myself. Sigh. Thus it shall always be, I suppose. And hopefully from my own victory will come the power that allows others to grasp ahold of great freedom as well.
So, my perfectly honest and thrillingly simple forward motion is going to look something like this:
- Get going! Period.
- Stop worrying about blogging “perfectly” or “by the book” and just go with the flow I’m in personally. (Those 10 blog posts I’m “supposed” to have waiting in the wings…uh, yeah, maybe in another life.)
- Potentially get tripped up or fall flat on my face at some point, but hey, it’s all forward motion, right?!
- Watch the ugly troll of comparison skulk off into the distance.
There you have it, my friends. From my little creative heart to yours. Let’s be done with comparison once and for all. I’d love to hear your story. Would you leave me a little comment below? And if you’re a blogger and have tips for me, I’m ALL ears! 🙂
My very first post on my very first blog….
It seems like it’s taken me a long time to get here, and yet, at the same time, like it was just yesterday that the idea of blogging came up. Why am I blogging? Ahhh, for so many reasons! To have a place to express my creative side, to document my thoughts and dreams about my family and life, to encourage me to reach deep inside and write from my heart. Mostly, though, I want this blog to be a resting place for anyone who happens by here. An inviting place from which one always leaves encouraged (and sometimes challenged). A place of connection between my heart and yours. Where bare feet and comfy jeans are the recommended attire, and the atmosphere is alive with the effervescence of life and grace. Welcome, my friend.